@ sanctuary

Why Men Cheat?

Posted by David Zinczenko

Of course, we all know that while men and women are both capable of
cheating, it's often the guys who have the biggest problem keeping
their belts firmly buckled. And we all know that no matter who it's
with, why it's done, or where the after-hours canoodling takes
place, cheating is-most of the time-the ultimate relationship death
sentence. But instead of dwelling on what happens after the cheating
takes place, one of the ways to perhaps prevent infidelity is by
knowing a little bit about why men stray. I'm not offering them as
excuses, merely explanations as to what happens in that brain (and
other body parts) of his-in hopes that you might be able to prevent
it. Here, the top reasons why men cheat:

To Fulfill His Biology:
You know the old anthropological tale. A man's main job, besides
killing the saber-tooth, is to spread his seed in order to ensure
the survival of his genetic legacy. It's a man's biology to want to
wander. Does that mean he should, or that he can't help it? Of
course not. But it does mean that a man is going to have strong-
extremely strong-biological urges to knock on the doors of
neighboring huts. I have had this argument/discussion /conversation
with dozens of men and women: Are men predestined to cheat? My
answer is no, they're not-despite their biology. But often times,
they do have to fight it. Especially after a pitcher and two shots
of Jack.



To Get the Attention:
News flash: Sure, some guys cheat because, well, maybe the sexual
frequency has slowed a bit, and maybe hot-and-heavy happens at home
about as often as Rob Schneider gets nominated for an Oscar. But the
truth is that plenty of men who are having regular sex with their
partner are also having sex with someone else. Why? Because cheating
isn't just about the sex. Just as a woman who cheats may be seeking
more affection than what she's getting at home, a man often cheats
because he's seeking the attention that he no longer gets at home.
Part of the allure of the mysterious woman isn't just to find out
what she looks like naked; it's that the woman showers the man with
flirtations, with seduction, with advances that make him feel like
he's worthy of more than just fixing dents in the drywall.

To Get Out:
I know lots of guys who simply don't have the strength to end it.
They may try ("I'm just not happy"), or they may take other tactics
to drive a woman away. A lot of guys simply have trouble breaking
off relationships because they don't want to be perceived as that
bad guy, the jerk, the insensitive lout who ended something good. So
they tiptoe around the issue in hopes that she'll get so frustrated
that she'll back out first. Well, if that doesn't work, then a man
knows that the only way out is to commit the relationship sin that
drives a woman away for good. It's not right, but it's what happens.

To Change Up His Play List:
Think about what's on your iPod. You have your favorite songs you
play over and over, but every once in a while, you're in the mood to
hear something you haven't played in a long time. You don't need to
hear it but once every month or so, but still, you appreciate the
changeup. Relationships need to be like good iPods lists. You're
comfortable with your routine and you like your routine, but it's
always nice to change things up. What men really want in
relationships (and what I suspect women also want) is to be able to
take comfort in the routine of a long-term commitment, as long as
there are some surprises that make it feel like a new relationship
every once in a while. In order to keep the relationship strong,
you've got to change the songs every once in a while. That goes for
in the bedroom and out.

Copyright © 2006 Yahoo! Inc.

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Dowie a mistake!

Charlton chief executive Peter Varney today admitted the club had made a mistake appointing Iain Dowie as head coach and confessed the promotion of Les Reed to replace him is a 'gamble'. The Charlton board have internally promoted former FA technical director Reed, 53, to replace head coach Dowie, who was sacked yesterday after just 12 Premiership games this term with the Addicks bottom following a 3-2 loss at Wigan. Varney felt the club had no choice but to dismiss former Crystal Palace boss Dowie following an unprecedented review of Charlton's set-up despite only recruiting him in the summer. The two-week review, which took place with Dowie's knowledge, included quizzing players and staff on the club's recent fortunes. And Varney concluded Charlton were certain to be relegated unless the club's hierarchy acted swiftly by dismissing Dowie and promoting Reed from his role as Dowie's assistant.

'This is not just about results,' said Varney, who revealed Dowie was axed in a phone call by chairman Richard Murray around 6pm last night. 'You hear things internally and you also bear in mind the performances on the pitch and the preparation for matches. 'So we conducted a review into every single aspect of what goes on in the football management side. 'That involved everyone who is part of that and we came to a conclusion things would not improve on the pitch and therefore we had to take the decision we did. 'When Iain arrived in the summer we put together a structure and we wanted everyone in it to be happy it could work. 'But in truth it hasn't and we had to take a reflection on why it wasn't working. 'There were aspects of what we set up we were concerned about but I don't think we have panicked. 'I think we have taken a very considered look at the football side and whether or not we might have won at Wigan, we would probably have come to the same decision.' Dowie, 41, arrived at The Valley in late May with an excellent reputation after his work at Selhurst Park. But Dowie's image is in tatters after Varney said it was an error appointing him and backing him with £11.2million to spend on several new players.

He added: 'People will look at it as a mistake now but we interviewed who we thought was the best candidate for the job and backed him financially. 'This club has the highest wage bill that it has ever had in its history. 'And there is an element of what Iain said in his interview which didn't happen in reality.' Varney also admitted the fact Dowie is being taken to court by Palace chairman Simon Jordan over his switch to The Valley was also a massive problem. But with Dowie gone, Varney believes Charlton's new management duo of Reed and coach Mark Robson, 37, can save the Addicks from the drop. He said: 'It is a little bit of a gamble but we think we have the right mix to get us out of this mess we are in. 'Les is fully qualified to do the job and we need stability. We think the combination of Les and Mark is an ideal one to take the club forward as Mark is a very aggressive, young and up-and-coming coach.

' Charlton are looking to add a third person to the management team - with Glenn Hoddle an early favourite among bookmakers. However, Dowie's predecessor Alan Curbishley is not interested in a return to the Valley, telling the Evening Standard: 'The club have been very stable for the last 15 years but they obviously felt it was something they needed to do. 'When I left there last May, though, I said I was looking for a fresh challenge and that is still the case.'

Hong Kong Pics

Me

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Deepavali!

Deepavali Fever has hit Klang, these are some pics taken by suresh...

Who Knew?

You took my hand
You showed me how
You promised me you'd be around
ah huh that's right

I took your words
And I believed
In everything you said to me
yeah huh that's right


If someone said three years from now
You'd be long gone
I'd stand up and punch them out
Cause they're all wrong
I know better
Cause you said forever
And ever
Who knew

Remember when we were such fools
And so convinced and just too cool
oh no no no

I wish I could touch you again
I wish I could still call you a friend
I'd give anything



When someone said count your blessings now
'Fore they're long gone
I guess I just didn't know how
I was all wrong
But they knew better
Still you said forever
And ever
Who Knew

Yeah yeah

I'll keep you locked in my head
Until we meet again
Until we until we meet again
And I won't forget you my friend
What happened


If someone said three years from now
You'd be long gone
I'd stand up and punch them out
Cause they're all wrong and
That last kiss I'll cherish
Until we meet again
And time makes it harder
I wish I could remember
But I keep your memory
You visit me in my sleep
My darlin' who knew

My darlin' my darlin' who knew
My darlin' I miss you
My darlin' who knew

Who knew

Meaning?

Is it true when they say friendship will only go to an extend, true love goes all the way?
I have to admit, I use to think the friendships I have was the best and it will go along till the day I die. But somehow it seems to be a mistake. Or maybe it is just me who is getting all paranoia on this matter.

It was me who had this idea, even if I am not in a serious relationship, I would be happy as my friends would tag along with me, just to make me feel a bit better. I was wrong.

It comes a point in everyone's life when you have so much things that you want to tell out but you just have to shut up and act normal just because you have no one to tell to, no one that you trust. Even if you have, you will be too insecure that it might bore them. Or even the perception they might have on you after you tell them whatever that is bugging your mind.

Sometimes, it is the matter of wetter they have time to actually sit down and listen to what you have to say. Let us put it this way, where are you in their priority list. It all drains down to how much they appreciate your friendship and how much do they have trust in you.

It is totally different now that I am 24 as I have learnt so much to be independent and not to rely on others as it is time for others to actually rely on me. It is a wonderful feeling when people come and tell you their problems and you try your best to help them out, at least for me. End of the day, I am not a self-centered person to be expecting much in return if their problems get solved. Somehow, a little bit of appreciation goes a long way. A"thank you" which comes from the bottom of their heart, simply gives me the pleasure.

Some people do not know how to show their appreciation. As they might say thank you, but then they don't mean it, as in for the sake of saying, I will say it as long as my things get settled, I don't care about you. That my friend, I can read.

It is truly disappointing when you expect someone to be there for you, you know they will be there for you, you trust them so much, but...they act cold. They get annoyed with you.

It is frustrating. But hey, who said life is simple? There are so many small things that will be an obstacle to bring you down. Put your head up and keep on walking, you will reach there somehow.

Many people have many ideas on what they should have done, what they should do now, what they want others to do. End of the day, it all depends to the individuals choice. If what they expect others to do is done, they will feel they are in control. What they do not understand is that they might offend so many others. Lets work in a team, let others enjoy the feeling that you have.

Do not ignore people because you have got what you want and they do not matter anymore. That is just typically an asshole's attitude. Don't think that it makes you look cool. Remember karma? You wouldn't want that. Trust me.

It took me a lot of effort in trying to put these in words as I don't know how to express how I feel. But this is close. There are still so many things missing and I know all, or maybe few have the same feeling that I am having right now.

May God bless everyone.

:)

Japanese people are weird

This is a toast vending machine!

This is a burger vending machine!!!!!

*Happy Onam* *Onam Ashamshagal*

YOU ARE AN INDIAN IF.....

1.Everything you eat is savored in garlic, onion and
tomatoes.

2.You try and reuse gift wrappers, gift boxes, and
of coursealuminium foil.

3.You try to eject food particles from between your
teeth bypressing your tongue against them and making
a peculiar  noise like,tshick,tshick, tschick, tschick.

4.You are standing next to the two largest size
suitcases at the Airport.

5.You arrive one or two hours late to a party - and
think it'snormal.

6.You peel the stamps off letters that the Postal
Servicemissed to mark up.

7.You recycle Wedding Gifts.

8.You name your children in rhythms (example,
Sita & Gita, Ram & Shyam)

9.All your children have pet names, which sound
nowhere close to their real names.

10.You take Indian snacks anywhere it says
"No Food Allowed"

11.You talk for an hour at the front door when
leaving someone's house.

12.You load up the family car with as many
people as possible.

13.You use plastic to cover anything new in your
house whetherit's the remote control, VCR,
carpet or new couch.

14.Your parents tell you not to care what your
friends think,but they won't let you do certain 
things because of what the other
"Uncles and Aunties" will think.

15.You buy and display crockery, which is for
specialoccasions,which never happen.

16.You have a vinyl tablecloth on your
kitchen table.

17.You use grocery bags to hold garbage.

18.You keep leftover food in your fridge in as
many numbers of bowls as possible.

19.Your kitchen shelf is full of jam jars,
varieties of bowlsand plastic utensils
(got free with some household items).

20.You carry a stash of your own food whenever
you travel (andtravel means any car ride longer
than 15 minutes).

21.You own a rice cooker or a pressure cooker.

22.You fight over who pays the dinner bill.

23.You live with your parents and you are 40 years
old. (And they prefer it that way).

24.You don't use measuring cups when cooking.

25.You never learnt how to stand in a queue.

26.You can only travel if there are 5 persons at
least to seeyou off or receive you whether you are
travelling by bus,  train orplane.

27.If she is NOT your daughter, you always take
interest inknowing whose daughter has run with
whose son and feel proud tospread it at the
velocity of more than the speed of light.

28.You only make long distance calls after 11 p.m.

29.If you don't live at home, when your parents call,
they ask if you've eaten, even if it's midnight.

30.You call an older person you never met before
"uncle."

31.When your parents meet strangers and talk for
a fewminutes,you discover you're talking to
a distant cousin.

32.Your parents don't realize phone connections
to foreigncountries have improved in the last two
decades, and still scream at the top of their
lungs when making foreign calls.

33.You have bed sheets on your sofas so as to keep
them from getting dirty.

34.It's embarrassing if your wedding has less than
600 people.

35.All your Tupperware is stained with food color.

36.You have drinking glasses made of steel.

37.You have mastered the art of bargaining in
shopping.

Fickle - damn fickle ya'll

fick‧le  /ˈfɪkəl/ Pronunciation Key - Show Spelled Pronunciation[fik-uhl] adjective

1.	likely to change, esp. due to caprice, irresolution, or instability; casually changeable: fickle weather.

2.	not constant or loyal in affections: a fickle lover.

kuang kuang kuang


I just realised that my last post was my 100th post. Hehehe...Never thought I could write so much.

What you guys plan to do for Merdeka? I am in the mood already!

As stupid as it may sound but I am actually looking forward to watch Siti's wedding party. I just want to see if it is going to be as grand as they have been publisizing. MALAYSIA BOLEH!

It has been a very bad start for charlton for this season. Usually charlton will play fucking well during the start of the season and fuck up badly as it nears to the end (like lailo says, after christmas, charlton gets into the spirit of loosing!) but we shall see if they will bounce back or will they get relegated this season! No wonder what people say, i sitll have faith in charlton. Come on guys!! Lets show the giants who we are!!

My grandma has finally finished her treatment. *sigh* No more hospital visits after this. Now she is back at home and i have to rush back everyday after work as she will be alone at home.
Somehow, I have begun to be very independent. I do laundry, feed the pets, clean up the house and most important of them all, i have learnt to cook! hahaha - the food which only i can eat-

It has been a terrible one month. I hope next month will be a better one, i already can feel the good vibes coming...;)

Been a bit tight on the finance this month also, all the running and bill payments. Unforetunately, by now I should have got my salary but then Jim is on holiday for one week. So, it has to wiat til monday. *sigh*

Have you guys listen + watch to evanessence new song? -call me when you're sober- excellent tune. I listen to it everyday!

Been hooked to rockstar-supernova. I want to be a rock star baby!

My car is due for service, but i haven't taken the effort to actually service it. Damn lazy siaaallll!
Planning to change the four tyres as well.

I am doing much of admin cum sales stuffs lately in the office. As much as I hated the sight of papers, numbers and talking to people, I am starting to get the hang of it. I am actually enjoying it! Can you believe it? The peterz who was complaining about his office is enjoying his job!

Been very busy trying to juggle office work and freelance work. Hectic but looking at the positive side, learning process. I love it!

I am loving my life now more than ever! spread the love you'all....lets hold hands and sing along with me...

I love you,
You love me,
We are friends like friends should be,
With a great big hug and a kiss from me to you..
Won't you say you love me too?
(The fucking purple dunasour style!)

Wooohhhooooooo

Ciaozzzzzz

Puteri Gunung Ledang - the musical

I am back!





I was fortunate enough to be able to attend this extravagant musical theatre in Istana Budaya on tuesday. I must say, the play took my breath away. It was fantastic! excellent! damn fucking good!

The lighting was fantastic! Due to my limited knowledge in the usage of olden-day malay language i was reading the subtitles which appeared on the electronic screen most of the time.

The costumes were fantastic! Starting with wonderful smells of jasmine as you walk into the theatre hall to the 'nenek kebayan''s costumes just amazed me truly.

The actors performed very well as they look so natural on stage. The character that got my attention most was Sultan Mahmud and his son. They were just so funny.

And then, the props used. Excelent! The stage movement and best of them all were the choreography of the dancers! They were just so good!

It is worth all the monet to get a glimps of the play, i would definetely recommend to anyone at all to go catch the play!

The only think that gave me a lil bit of pull-back was the fact that they potrayed Hang Tuah to be such a softy! He sings love songs all the time, like romeo in romeo and juliet. In fact, Hang Tuah suppose to be this strong powerful warrior! But it was a great play I must admit.

So, guys if you dont know what to do during your free time, go watch the play!


100% guranteed you will go oooo and ahhhhh

Perdana Global Peace Forum - special session 2006

Good News!!! The link to the videos is up!
Please feel free to watch it, you will know what I was talking about on my previous post!

perdana global peace forum - special session 06

Perdana Global Peace Forum

For those who didn't know about the peace forum which was going on during the past two days.

Perdana Global Peace Forum (Special Session 2006)
criminalise war - stop WORLD WAR IV
(the coming nuclear wars)

20-23 June 2006
PLF,Putrajaya & PWTC, Kuala Lumpur.

Moderator : Dato' Mukhriz Mahathir
Speakers :
H.E Tun Dr. Mahathir Mohamad
(Former Prime Minister of Malaysia and Chairman of the Perdana Global Peace Organisation)
Mr. Denis Halliday
(Former UN Assistant Secretary-General,and UN Humanitarian Co-ordinator in Iraq)
Mr. Hans Von Sponeck
(Former UN Assistant Secretary General, and UN Humanitarian Co-ordinator in Iraq)
Dr. Helen Caldicott
(Nuclear Policy Research Institute(NPRI) Founder and President, USA
Prof. Dr Michel Chossudovsky
(Director of the Centre for Research on Globalization(CRG), Canada and outhor of "Globalization of Poverty")
Prof. Francis A Boyle
(Professor of Law, University of Illinois, responsible for drafting the 1972 Bilogical Weapons Convention.)

It was a very insightful discussion that made me worry and rage in anger over people who create war. If I were you, I would try my level best to stop the war as we will be effected in it also. Be smart. I have attached the link to Perdana Global Peace Foundation wensite link here. Try to help. Maybe spread the news in your blogs. It might help to stop the killings of the innocents and your life too.

http://www.perdana4peace.org/

SPREAD THE NEWS AS THE WORLD IS GOING TO COME TO AN END IF WE SIT BACK AND WATCH.

p/s: the videos of the forum will be up soon. i will update you guys. Please watch the videos and you will know what i am talking about. Don't do this for me, do this for yourself, your future, your childrens.

I also took a pic with Tun Dr. Siti Asmah, hehehe

One quote that still remains in my mind which DR.M said, this earth was not given to us by our encestors, it was loaned to us by our children. Give it back to them, in one piece. :)

Happy Birthday Nivs!

Let the game begin

MOnday BLues

Is it just me or the whole day seems useless today. Maybe this is what they call monday blues. I don't feel like doing anything.
I came to the offce today and realised we were out of coffee. I rushed to the petronas mesra to get nescafe 3-1 red sackets. I came back to the office, the wirelss card didnt work. So, now i am using LAN connection which is fucking slow for no reason. I don't feel like doing work at all. Went for lunch as i felt like eating today (surprisingly!) wanted to eat in nasi yama malaysia but saw robert there which very much turned our plan and ended up eating in hassans.
now back in the office watching my boss trying to figure out Darim to work which is impossible because it is not a server, i mean purely for server use but it is more to virtualsets. i just left him to figure it out as i am so not in the mood of arguing with him. I am actually sitting down next to him and typing this blog. He doesnt care, as if he did, i would just tell him to buzz off or im quiting.
I dont feel like working anymore, i mean really, retiring at the age 24, any country offers that? i am sick of working my ass off. i just want to sit at home doing nothing. God.

Weekend was fantabulously exciting. I was in penang. Left on thursday at 9.30 pm from Klang and came back to Klang at 3.30 am on sunday. The main reason was interview, two of it, one in KDU, one in Segi college. Both looks promising but lets just see if i meant to work in Penang. Or just die trying in cyberjaya.

I am soooo fucking annoyed with everything right now. So....everyone else who feel like me please stand up, please stand up.

Let me spoil it for you!

LOS ANGELES (Reuters) - Soul singer Taylor Hicks won the 2006 "American Idol" contest on Wednesday, beating ballad singer Katharine McPhee in votes cast by fans of the most watched TV show in the United States.

Hicks, 29, whose prematurely graying hair and manic dancing has made him been a consistent favorite among the show's 30 million regular viewers, won a coveted recording contract and will release a single called "Do I Make You Proud."

The show, airing twice weekly, has given the Fox network the biggest hit in prime time and propelled the broadcaster to first place this season in the ratings race for viewers aged 18 to 49, the audience most prized by advertisers.

American Idol Season 5 Finals

Age: 22

Hometown: Sherman Oaks, CA

Audition City: San Francisco

Favorite Female Artist:
Whitney

Favorite Male Artist:
Brian McKnight

Age: 29

Hometown: Birmingham, AL

Audition City: Las Vegas

Favorite Female Artist:
Cyndi Lauper.

Favorite Male Artist:
Billy Joel, Van Morrison, Bob Seger

KAT vs TAYLOR TONIGHT

After months of heated competition, dozens of performances and millions of votes, it all comes down to tonight. You won't want to miss Katharine and Taylor try to out-perform one another to become the newest American Idol. Who is going to be the next american idol?